[ Two of them? Shit... Joon-gi sighed heavily through his nose and ran a hand through his hair. Unacceptable. ]
You didn't have to do that.
[ Was this some sort of payback for Joon-gi staying up half the night before? Maybe. It was a sweet gesture on Zhao's part—and Joon-gi did appreciate the extra hours of sleep—but he worried this was going to set a bad precedent. He didn't want Zhao to feel like he had to take on the onus of caring for this kitten when Joon-gi was the one who had brought her home in the first place.
Zhao mentioned food, and Joon-gi remembered that all he'd eaten that day was a couple of strawberry crepes. He winced inwardly. Yes, it was a cheat day, but he needed more than just sugar and carbs for a balanced diet.
He nodded cautiously, even though he didn't exactly feel very hungry right now. ]
I should probably eat something. Maybe I'll just steal a little off your plate, if that's alright with you?
[ He'd mostly meant it as a joke, and even managed a small smile as he sat down at the table. Zhao placed a cup of tea in front of him. He picked it up in both hands, savoring the warmth and the aroma. He could smell the karaage as Zhao took a bite, and his stomach grumbled petulantly, as though conceding the fact that maybe he was just a little hungry.
Joon-gi took a cautious sip of his tea, then nearly choked when Zhao led in with that rather pointed opening statement. He covered his mouth with one hand as he tried to clear his airways. ]
I... um. You're welcome? I guess?
[ He felt his entire face heat up with a mixture of embarrassment and shame. Zhao made a rather apt comparison, about how they both dove in head-first without really being prepared, and Joon-gi couldn't help but feel as if he had failed them both on this point. ]
You're right. We both leapt headfirst into dangerous waters, as you put it. But I'm the one who took you by the hand and asked you to jump with me. [ He dropped his gaze, unable to look into Zhao's eyes any longer. ] And for that, you have my sincerest apology.
[ He stared into his tea and swallowed hard. Maybe he shouldn't have said anything at all. He should have bitten his tongue and swallowed down such shameful desires, especially ones which evoked memories of him...
They sat there in uncomfortable silence while Joon-gi tried to process everything. Finally, he said: ] I think... it would be for the best if you didn't see that side of me anymore...
[ As much as he enjoyed that brief feeling of power, he understood how easily it could be abused, how easily he could have hurt Zhao without truly meaning to. It was fortunate that they had managed to navigate such turbulent waters relatively unscathed, but would Joon-gi risk Zhao's wellbeing just to chase some momentary pleasure, no matter how enticing?
He felt his stomach twist tighter than a Gordian knot at the thought of hurting Zhao over something so selfish. ]
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2024-09-25 10:05 pm (UTC)You didn't have to do that.
[ Was this some sort of payback for Joon-gi staying up half the night before? Maybe. It was a sweet gesture on Zhao's part—and Joon-gi did appreciate the extra hours of sleep—but he worried this was going to set a bad precedent. He didn't want Zhao to feel like he had to take on the onus of caring for this kitten when Joon-gi was the one who had brought her home in the first place.
Zhao mentioned food, and Joon-gi remembered that all he'd eaten that day was a couple of strawberry crepes. He winced inwardly. Yes, it was a cheat day, but he needed more than just sugar and carbs for a balanced diet.
He nodded cautiously, even though he didn't exactly feel very hungry right now. ]
I should probably eat something. Maybe I'll just steal a little off your plate, if that's alright with you?
[ He'd mostly meant it as a joke, and even managed a small smile as he sat down at the table. Zhao placed a cup of tea in front of him. He picked it up in both hands, savoring the warmth and the aroma. He could smell the karaage as Zhao took a bite, and his stomach grumbled petulantly, as though conceding the fact that maybe he was just a little hungry.
Joon-gi took a cautious sip of his tea, then nearly choked when Zhao led in with that rather pointed opening statement. He covered his mouth with one hand as he tried to clear his airways. ]
I... um. You're welcome? I guess?
[ He felt his entire face heat up with a mixture of embarrassment and shame. Zhao made a rather apt comparison, about how they both dove in head-first without really being prepared, and Joon-gi couldn't help but feel as if he had failed them both on this point. ]
You're right. We both leapt headfirst into dangerous waters, as you put it. But I'm the one who took you by the hand and asked you to jump with me. [ He dropped his gaze, unable to look into Zhao's eyes any longer. ] And for that, you have my sincerest apology.
[ He stared into his tea and swallowed hard. Maybe he shouldn't have said anything at all. He should have bitten his tongue and swallowed down such shameful desires, especially ones which evoked memories of him...
They sat there in uncomfortable silence while Joon-gi tried to process everything. Finally, he said: ] I think... it would be for the best if you didn't see that side of me anymore...
[ As much as he enjoyed that brief feeling of power, he understood how easily it could be abused, how easily he could have hurt Zhao without truly meaning to. It was fortunate that they had managed to navigate such turbulent waters relatively unscathed, but would Joon-gi risk Zhao's wellbeing just to chase some momentary pleasure, no matter how enticing?
He felt his stomach twist tighter than a Gordian knot at the thought of hurting Zhao over something so selfish. ]